{"id":263,"date":"2023-03-16T11:40:21","date_gmt":"2023-03-16T11:40:21","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/trove.aui.ma\/?p=263"},"modified":"2023-03-16T11:40:21","modified_gmt":"2023-03-16T11:40:21","slug":"to-the-boy-that-still-lingers-in-my-dreams","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/trove.aui.ma\/?p=263","title":{"rendered":"To the Boy That Still Lingers in My Dreams"},"content":{"rendered":"

As your silhouette kept destroying my neatly folded thoughts<\/span>
\nI followed your shadow deep inside the cemetery of my long-forgotten memories<\/span>
\nBut I didn\u2019t find your grave.<\/span>
\nIt was as if you blossomed into an orchid of secrets,<\/span>
\nspreading rapidly to every cell, every thought and every breath claiming them back<\/span>
\nLast time I checked,<\/span>
\nI thought I ripped your presence from the blue bird that whimpers weakly behind my lungs,<\/span>
\nI thought I cried your love rivers of insecurities and washed away my heart from your touch<\/span>
\nYet when I dusted it for your fingertips<\/span>
\nI found mountains of sweetly poisoned memories<\/span>
\nI found a box of all the butterfly I had felt whenever you smiled my way<\/span>
\nI found all the moments that I<\/span>
\nwas being held helplessly inside the fascinating truths behind your eyes<\/span>
\nI found all the lies that hid perfectly her silhouette behind your smiles.<\/span>
\nIt drove me crazy Knowing that she was right in your arms<\/span>
\nThat I heard her in your voice,<\/span>
\nThat I smelled her perfume in the corners of your heart.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

I had a crazy dream last night<\/span>
\nYou were Judas and I was crucified<\/span>
\nMy hands were nailed to the edges of your deceits<\/span>
\nstretching back to the first time you showed me what does it mean to love.<\/span>
\nThey were tied the snowy texture of your heart that suffocated me every time I<\/span>
\ndipped my feet further in the ocean where you kept all your secrets<\/span>
\nI was wounded, crying out blood dunked in the color of your face.<\/span>
\nIt had A lovely shade of betrayal.<\/span>
\nA nice hue of lies.<\/span>
\nIn my dream, I screamed you name for infinity<\/span>
\nI whispered you to every bottle of wine,<\/span>
\nI looked for you on every dance floor,<\/span>
\nI rearranged the stars,<\/span>
\nrealigned the planets,<\/span>
\nhoping that this time my luck would change;<\/span>
\nBut it never did<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

You see falling for you taught me that throwing yourself over the cliff of love is not scary<\/span>
\nIt is exhilarating<\/span>
\nIt is freeing,<\/span>
\nBut it never prepared me to the moment my self-esteem hit the ground<\/span>
\nand shuttered into million pieces of insecurities<\/span>
\nIt never told me what to do when my king-sized bed starts to narrow<\/span>
\nuntil it no longer fits anyone.<\/span>
\nIt never showed me How to erase your details from the faces I bring with me at night.<\/span>
\nInstead it got me drunk on your voicemails<\/span>
\nI grind your pictures with her, and get high on a love that we never had<\/span>
\nReminding myself that she is your everything<\/span>
\nand I\u2019m merely a breeze of wind that crossed your path<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

As your silhouette kept destroying my neatly folded thoughts I followed your shadow deep inside the cemetery of my long-forgotten memories But I didn\u2019t find your grave. It was as if you blossomed into an orchid of secrets, spreading rapidly to every cell, every thought and every breath claiming them back Last time I checked, … Continue reading “To the Boy That Still Lingers in My Dreams”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":22,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":"","_ppma_block_editor_authors":""},"categories":[20],"tags":[],"ppma_author":[13],"class_list":["post-263","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-free-verse"],"authors":[{"term_id":13,"user_id":22,"is_guest":0,"slug":"wissal-err","display_name":"Wissal Errachidi","avatar_url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/5578eb5847147b2d4755e1143d7c2bdcf1cb7d1f68dee5dde27f632c7217ec30?s=96&d=mm&r=g","author_category":"","user_url":"","last_name":"Errachidi","first_name":"Wissal","job_title":"","description":""}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/trove.aui.ma\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/263","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/trove.aui.ma\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/trove.aui.ma\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/trove.aui.ma\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/22"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/trove.aui.ma\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=263"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/trove.aui.ma\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/263\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":265,"href":"https:\/\/trove.aui.ma\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/263\/revisions\/265"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/trove.aui.ma\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=263"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/trove.aui.ma\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=263"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/trove.aui.ma\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=263"},{"taxonomy":"author","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/trove.aui.ma\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fppma_author&post=263"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}